Today is Wednesday : an ordinary day for some of us, but not for me!
Because today is Wishcasting Wednesday* *yeah*
Jamie’s* prompt this week is “What do I wish to experience?”
Hmmmm. Now let me see. There’s lots and lots of things I would love to experience – but do I plump for the hopelessly unrealistic experiences (i.e. waking up tomorrow morning with a perfect hourglass figure to experience and revel in) or do I plump for the achievable experiences?
Well, with so many experiences to choose from there is only one way to do this. Sit and wait … fingers poised on keyboard and let us see what comes out.
I wish to experience a light heart
Oh, well that is interesting. That little topic did not figure on my original mind-list … so where has that come from?
Let me see. I have had a pretty full-on few months and, as most of you know, I recently completed my surgery-chemotherapy-radiotherapy treatments for TN Breast Cancer. Last week I disappeared for a few days to dive into the Approach retreat, held at the Penny Brohn cancer centre in Bristol – and a few deep issues surfaced that I was, if I am brutally honest with myself and with you, dear reader, really hoping to keep squashed down and hidden from view. From myself.
Which is pretty daft: after all, in my work with my adorable coaching clients and in our retreats, I love to hold that space for people to explore their deepest issues and support them, help to bloom and become fully empowered, as they face their shadow-side and transform the shadows into beautiful light.
And so it is for me too … I need external support to be able to follow the same process, and thus last week I needed to face up to reality and to face my shadows. For to bring certain issues to the surface is the surest way to start up the agony again: the fear, the realisation that it is all down to me now (gulp!). It is infinitely easier to walk away (or run – fast!) from the fear that likes to get an icy grip on my heart every now and again. But to really explore these shadows with nurturing, supportive professionals and sit with my emotions was a much-needed process; from there, I dived into their gorgeous Art Therapy wonderland-room and transformed my emotions into creations – paintings and a clay goddess.
I appreciate, and acknowledge, the feeling of being truly blessed at the end of the week, for on my return journey home I felt as if the shadows had been pierced by slithers of radiant light. The shadows are still there, waiting and eager to jump forth at an opportune moment, but the radiant light is slowly seeping in, expanding with each breath and gently washing away the shadows as dawn rises slowly in my heart.
So heck yes, I wish to experience a light heart – and I can feel myself making steady headway there. Hurrah!!
** Discover more about Jamie Ridler’s gorgeous Wishcasting Wednesday: Wishcasting Wednesday